DrugTesting and Adoption
ADOPTION INSIGHT
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Written by KS
Last Updated: Friday, 24 July 2009
What should our reasonable expectations be of a chosen Birth Mother and potential drug
history? Are we being realistic? What is our definition of drugs? Do we have all the facts or
just some observations that made us draw conclusions? How aware are we of medical
privacy laws? How do medical privacy laws affect all adoption processes?
In the most rigid of definitions our county has become a drug culture. We don't like to think
of ourselves in that way but, if something aches or we get the sniffles, we take drugs. The
truth is a simple aspirin can be dangerous, as can acetaminophen, and the popular
antihistamines many of us take when we have allergies. Prescription drugs like Prozac for anxiety
and the common drug prescribed for many children and adults, Ritalin, are prescription drugs
allowed by law in one instance and an illegal street drug in another
instance. Whatever the name of the drug and whether or not it was prescribed,
mis-prescribed, or a street drug, this country is doing drugs.
Even antibiotics at the wrong time in a pregnancy or a small child's life can have long-term
effects. Drugs are an issue if they are recreational or medically advised.
We all know alcohol and tobacco can be harmful in a pregnancy or around a small child but
once again, these substances are legal and have been in common use in the country for
centuries. Many of us were most likely the babies of a mother who regularly practiced the
use of alcohol, or smoking or worse yet, took common prescription medications that we now
know can do irreversible damage to a developing fetus. Here we are, healthy, hopefully
happy and well adjusted, successful enough to be considering adoption and wanting the
best possible situation for the child we plan to adopt.
The truth is, not all of life's developments are affected by the same disruptions in cell
structure at the time of conception or during life. It is a toss of the dice if any of us will be
healthy enough to be a biological parent, a competent parent, or even a parent who will live
long enough to fully parent the child we want to adopt. The birth Mother and Child are not
getting an absolute guarantee from adoptive parents either. Why do potential adoptive
parents look to be guaranteed what nature it self can not guarantee even if the Birth Mother
and pregnancy evolved in a sterile test tube?
It is always wise to make informed decisions with as much background information as
possible. However, if we are looking to adopt the perfect child with the perfect background
and absolutely no risk, well we needed to start with Adam and Eve. Were Adam and Eve
perfect? Is it time to give up our unreasonable expectations? There are organizations and
individuals that are happy to accept our money and make us promises based on what they
believe the truth to be, or in some cases based on the truth they believe we want to hear.
The truth is always somewhere in between and it is always a risk.
Most of the potential adoptive parents want the birth mothers to be screened for drug use.
Of course they want the best for the baby they want to adopt, that issue was never in
question. No one is attempting to criminalize or penalize the birth mother that is not in
question here, even though it can feel that way to birth mothers at times.
When one begins to understand a little more about drug testing or disease testing, you
begin to understand how much you're really asking. If drug testing is important to you,
research the topic before becoming involved in the adoption process and know exactly what
you're expecting and expect to wait longer to find the infant or child you want.
If we are the first potential parenting couple to request drug testing and the Birth Mother
agrees to the test, we should be prepared to pay drug testing fees aside from the usual and
customary fees for adoption. We can anticipate paying drug-testing fees in advance of the
testing to be done. With this in mind, when and if do we request such testing? How many
Birth Mother tests do we want to do before deciding on a Birth Mother?
On the topic of drug testing, damage to a fetus is most likely done before the woman realizes
she is pregnant. Hair and nail analysis are the only tests that will give the information
backward many months to the time she became pregnant. Again, research needs to be
done to find out what tests need to be done and the costs of such tests before making the
request. Remember, we want to adopt a child that was not a planned pregnancy or we
would be talking in terms of surrogacy or our own pregnancy. If we were planning to become
pregnant, as with many well informed couples today, we would be going to the doctor to
make sure we are in good health and adjusting diets and being extra cautious with alcohol
and even cold medications. Unless we are talking about our own pregnancy or even a
surrogate, all the precautions in the world are no longer an option. These decisions are long
gone.
Once all parties decide there is a workable arrangement to adopt, regular updated medical
information on the mother's health and the health of the child she is caring will be provided.
Generally this information is provided through the attorney, agency or facilitator we are
working with. In some instances it may be the Birth Mother who gives us regular reports or
she maybe comfortable enough with the arrangement to sign a medical release of
information. Sometimes we will become financially responsible for her medical care at this
point. Sometimes she has medical care. No matter who is paying for the medical care the
Birth Mother still has a right to medical privacy. As a way of getting the information we all
feel we have a need to know and still protecting the medical privacy rights of the Birth
Mother, many times the medical release of information is signed to allow the Facilitator or
other third party to act as a buffer zone and protect the Birth Mother's information that is not
critical to the adoption process or the health of the child.
There are some decisions that have to be made on faith alone or some method of trust that
has to be established with the other professional parties we are working with. The fact the
Birth Mother is even considering adoption is evidence how much she cares about the infant
she is caring and is a testament to the fact she wants a good and healthy life for this child.
With abortion being a real option in this country for "unwanted" pregnancies, it is a wise
person who realizes the mother carrying the child, she now knows she is responsible for, is
doing everything in her ability to give this child not only life but a healthy life.
We have medical confidentiality in this country for many reasons. If we are requesting a
drug screen of a birth mother, it should be mutually expected. We all share the concerns for
the child. The Birth Mother wants confident healthy parents for the child she is caring as
much as we want a healthy baby to parent. Don't be alarmed if she is unwilling to take our
word if we are unwilling to take her at her word. Sometimes the drug-screening request is the
alarm that alerts a Birth Mother to the attitudes of the prospective adoption parents and
could send the whole process into an unrecoverable spin.
We have all known people that have difficulties with many things in their lives. It could be as
simple as sugar or as complex as pregnancy hormones and prescription anti-depressants
but birth mothers need our support to deliver a healthy child. Remember they don't need
our judgments or the added character examinations because we have made assumptions
with little or no real information and an expectation of information that is confidential. If the
women who have chosen to place their child for adoption were in our perfect place, who
knows if they would still be offering us this miraculous opportunity. Yes, that is right; our
place may not be as perfect as we might like to portray. We may not have made all the right
decisions in our earlier life, and then again maybe we are assuming way too much as to why
the adoption process is a consideration. Maybe we are assuming our outer exterior says we
don't drink, or do recreational drugs, or our prescription medications are all presently well
balanced and we will be a well-balanced parent for the child entering this world.
With all these assumptions and miss-assessed information or lack of information, how much
do we want to be a parent? Are we willing to give as much as we expect in the relationship of
all parties entering into this adoption? Would we love and care for the child we adopt if we
later found out that to keep the pregnancy (now our child) the mother with an infection took
tetracycline and now our child will have permanently yellow teeth or worse? What if the
mother's hormones required that she be medicated to be emotionally stable and this is also
a risk? What if it was our pregnancy? What risks are we willing to accept and still love and
care for the child.
Last Updated: Friday, 24 July 2009
Last Updated: Friday, 24 July 2009
What should our reasonable expectations be of a chosen Birth Mother and potential drug
history? Are we being realistic? What is our definition of drugs? Do we have all the facts or
just some observations that made us draw conclusions? How aware are we of medical
privacy laws? How do medical privacy laws affect all adoption processes?
In the most rigid of definitions our county has become a drug culture. We don't like to think
of ourselves in that way but, if something aches or we get the sniffles, we take drugs. The
truth is a simple aspirin can be dangerous, as can acetaminophen, and the popular
antihistamines many of us take when we have allergies. Prescription drugs like Prozac for anxiety
and the common drug prescribed for many children and adults, Ritalin, are prescription drugs
allowed by law in one instance and an illegal street drug in another
instance. Whatever the name of the drug and whether or not it was prescribed,
mis-prescribed, or a street drug, this country is doing drugs.
Even antibiotics at the wrong time in a pregnancy or a small child's life can have long-term
effects. Drugs are an issue if they are recreational or medically advised.
We all know alcohol and tobacco can be harmful in a pregnancy or around a small child but
once again, these substances are legal and have been in common use in the country for
centuries. Many of us were most likely the babies of a mother who regularly practiced the
use of alcohol, or smoking or worse yet, took common prescription medications that we now
know can do irreversible damage to a developing fetus. Here we are, healthy, hopefully
happy and well adjusted, successful enough to be considering adoption and wanting the
best possible situation for the child we plan to adopt.
The truth is, not all of life's developments are affected by the same disruptions in cell
structure at the time of conception or during life. It is a toss of the dice if any of us will be
healthy enough to be a biological parent, a competent parent, or even a parent who will live
long enough to fully parent the child we want to adopt. The birth Mother and Child are not
getting an absolute guarantee from adoptive parents either. Why do potential adoptive
parents look to be guaranteed what nature it self can not guarantee even if the Birth Mother
and pregnancy evolved in a sterile test tube?
It is always wise to make informed decisions with as much background information as
possible. However, if we are looking to adopt the perfect child with the perfect background
and absolutely no risk, well we needed to start with Adam and Eve. Were Adam and Eve
perfect? Is it time to give up our unreasonable expectations? There are organizations and
individuals that are happy to accept our money and make us promises based on what they
believe the truth to be, or in some cases based on the truth they believe we want to hear.
The truth is always somewhere in between and it is always a risk.
Most of the potential adoptive parents want the birth mothers to be screened for drug use.
Of course they want the best for the baby they want to adopt, that issue was never in
question. No one is attempting to criminalize or penalize the birth mother that is not in
question here, even though it can feel that way to birth mothers at times.
When one begins to understand a little more about drug testing or disease testing, you
begin to understand how much you're really asking. If drug testing is important to you,
research the topic before becoming involved in the adoption process and know exactly what
you're expecting and expect to wait longer to find the infant or child you want.
If we are the first potential parenting couple to request drug testing and the Birth Mother
agrees to the test, we should be prepared to pay drug testing fees aside from the usual and
customary fees for adoption. We can anticipate paying drug-testing fees in advance of the
testing to be done. With this in mind, when and if do we request such testing? How many
Birth Mother tests do we want to do before deciding on a Birth Mother?
On the topic of drug testing, damage to a fetus is most likely done before the woman realizes
she is pregnant. Hair and nail analysis are the only tests that will give the information
backward many months to the time she became pregnant. Again, research needs to be
done to find out what tests need to be done and the costs of such tests before making the
request. Remember, we want to adopt a child that was not a planned pregnancy or we
would be talking in terms of surrogacy or our own pregnancy. If we were planning to become
pregnant, as with many well informed couples today, we would be going to the doctor to
make sure we are in good health and adjusting diets and being extra cautious with alcohol
and even cold medications. Unless we are talking about our own pregnancy or even a
surrogate, all the precautions in the world are no longer an option. These decisions are long
gone.
Once all parties decide there is a workable arrangement to adopt, regular updated medical
information on the mother's health and the health of the child she is caring will be provided.
Generally this information is provided through the attorney, agency or facilitator we are
working with. In some instances it may be the Birth Mother who gives us regular reports or
she maybe comfortable enough with the arrangement to sign a medical release of
information. Sometimes we will become financially responsible for her medical care at this
point. Sometimes she has medical care. No matter who is paying for the medical care the
Birth Mother still has a right to medical privacy. As a way of getting the information we all
feel we have a need to know and still protecting the medical privacy rights of the Birth
Mother, many times the medical release of information is signed to allow the Facilitator or
other third party to act as a buffer zone and protect the Birth Mother's information that is not
critical to the adoption process or the health of the child.
There are some decisions that have to be made on faith alone or some method of trust that
has to be established with the other professional parties we are working with. The fact the
Birth Mother is even considering adoption is evidence how much she cares about the infant
she is caring and is a testament to the fact she wants a good and healthy life for this child.
With abortion being a real option in this country for "unwanted" pregnancies, it is a wise
person who realizes the mother carrying the child, she now knows she is responsible for, is
doing everything in her ability to give this child not only life but a healthy life.
We have medical confidentiality in this country for many reasons. If we are requesting a
drug screen of a birth mother, it should be mutually expected. We all share the concerns for
the child. The Birth Mother wants confident healthy parents for the child she is caring as
much as we want a healthy baby to parent. Don't be alarmed if she is unwilling to take our
word if we are unwilling to take her at her word. Sometimes the drug-screening request is the
alarm that alerts a Birth Mother to the attitudes of the prospective adoption parents and
could send the whole process into an unrecoverable spin.
We have all known people that have difficulties with many things in their lives. It could be as
simple as sugar or as complex as pregnancy hormones and prescription anti-depressants
but birth mothers need our support to deliver a healthy child. Remember they don't need
our judgments or the added character examinations because we have made assumptions
with little or no real information and an expectation of information that is confidential. If the
women who have chosen to place their child for adoption were in our perfect place, who
knows if they would still be offering us this miraculous opportunity. Yes, that is right; our
place may not be as perfect as we might like to portray. We may not have made all the right
decisions in our earlier life, and then again maybe we are assuming way too much as to why
the adoption process is a consideration. Maybe we are assuming our outer exterior says we
don't drink, or do recreational drugs, or our prescription medications are all presently well
balanced and we will be a well-balanced parent for the child entering this world.
With all these assumptions and miss-assessed information or lack of information, how much
do we want to be a parent? Are we willing to give as much as we expect in the relationship of
all parties entering into this adoption? Would we love and care for the child we adopt if we
later found out that to keep the pregnancy (now our child) the mother with an infection took
tetracycline and now our child will have permanently yellow teeth or worse? What if the
mother's hormones required that she be medicated to be emotionally stable and this is also
a risk? What if it was our pregnancy? What risks are we willing to accept and still love and
care for the child.
Last Updated: Friday, 24 July 2009
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